Powerful techniques to optimize your emotions, beliefs, and behaviors

Finding a Silver Lining in a Crisis, Defeat, or Loss


This questionnaire helps us locate any positive rewards in a crisis, defeat, or loss.  Jot down any positive rewards that occur in answering these questions.  Keep this inventory of positive rewards and examine them.  Little in life is completely negative when we step outside of constricted awareness. 



Did this circumstance provide me with something to learn?

Did it build my patience? Did it build my ability to withstand pain, frustration, and annoyance?

Were there any rewards from this circumstance that I might begin to notice now?

Was I able to exercise my creativity and intelligence in this situation? Learn how to self-correct and do things differently?

Did it bring me closer to my friends and family or perhaps help me make me new friends?

Did it help me create a future support system?

How did I grow emotionally from this circumstance?

How did I rise to the occasion and demonstrate character under poor conditions?

Did I learn anything about accepting myself? Others? Circumstances?

Have I learned to better marshal my inner resources?

What did I learn about acceptance?

What did I learn about forgiveness?

Am I better at problem solving now?

What did I come to understand about coping with and overcoming a crisis and defeat?

Did these circumstances allow me to utilize my talents and the talents of others?

In looking back did I show commitment and stick-to-itiveness? Am I proud of that?

How did I learn how to be more flexible and more open to feedback?

In retrospect did I find any humor in my circumstances?

Looking back at my crisis, defeat, or loss from 3 years in the future, what would I notice?

What skills did I gain from the experience?

How did I get help from my unconscious or my spiritual life?

Has my introspective eye improved?

Did I face the worst and know now that I can survive it?

Did this experience build my resilience?

Did I learn who I could count on in a tough situation?

Did this experience prepare me for something better?

Did I get a better appreciation of life and the world around me?

Is my fear of failure less so or even gone?

Did my compassion grow?

Has my health improved?

Do I feel optimistic since I made this passage?

Did I learn something valuable about my attitudes toward this crisis, defeat, or loss? Do I think differently about these circumstances?

What actions might I take, knowing what I know now, if I faced the same situation?

What helped me see my situation more clearly?

Take care, Steve


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