Self-Helpapedia

Powerful techniques to optimize your emotions, beliefs, and behaviors

Tips on Building Our Inner Resolve or Will

Our inner resolve, will, or stick-to-itiveness can be strengthened through approaches like the I Stood It Exercise or The Will Building Exercise (below). Inner resolve can be developed and is made up of several key ingredients. Outwardly inner resolve or will appears as the faculty of conscious or deliberate action and our power to determine and control what we are doing.

When our inner resolve is strong it appears to contain some or all of these ingredients:

A clear conscious choice is made.

Commitment and stick-to-itiveness are present. The person will not give up on a commitment no matter what mood, emotion, or roadblocks they face.

The intentions are sharply defined and are competing with a minimum of counter intentions and doubts. The intention is strong in the background of awareness.

A strong purpose fuels the will.

High frustration tolerance is present. The person can stand anything and is not easily overwhelmed if what they are undertaking is important to them. Their patience is high.

The person likely sees a meaning or value in what's to be done.

The person might also view a well-formed outcome.

They have the knowledge that someone can choose to take action regardless of how they are feeling.

All of the above contribute to a strong inner resolve that can be increased with training.

Let's take a look at how the inner resolve or will can be empowered and trained:

*If you desire to have strong intentions you can choose an intention aligned with your core values. The Intention Drill can be valuable here.

 

*Folks who have a strong will will spend little time resisting desires and cravings.  They don't put themselves in situations where their self-defeating desires and cravings show up.  They arrange their life to avoid problem situations.  No bars.  No hanging out by the fridge in the kitchen. 

*Conscious choice can be made by weighing the pros and cons of an undertaking and making a committed choice.

 

*When you undergo a crisis or large stresses it is not the time to make large changes in your life like quitting smoking or drinking.

Crisis and stresses will capsize the best intentions.

 

*Adhere to your schedules and commitments.  Procrastination stimulates stress, anxiety, and guilt all of which weaken will power.

 

*Eat right and get enough sleep.  They make you more resilient to face cravings and desires.

 

*Reward yourself for your victories over desires and cravings.

 

*Chart your progress--write it down.  It helps your will no end to see progress.


*Commitment and stick-to-itiveness can be made iron bound by sincerely agreeing to stick to a course of action no matter what comes up. Commitment can be increased by affirming it at the gut level. If any emotion or doubt opposes your commitment you can further strengthen it by integrating that emotion or doubt.

*High frustration tolerance can be built by processing and integrating low frustration tolerance thoughts and feelings. Doing the I Stood It Exercise can be helpful here in overcoming low frustration tolerance and impatience.

*A person helps themselves by seeing the meaning and value in their undertaking. If you choose to wash dishes you realize they not only look good-- clean plates protect your health.

*A well formed outcome can be seen in the Goal Maker or by taking the time to see what the end results might look like. This can be motivating for the will.

*Someone can learn to take action no matter how they're feeling. This can increase will. A Call to Action can assist in overcoming inertia.

THE WILL BUILDING EXERCISE

Warning: Folks with a history of mental illness, PTSD, or panic are urged not to use these techniques without a therapist. If you decide to do these processes you will agree to absolve the webmaster, the webhost, Emoclear.com, and Steve Mensing of any responsibility for the application or misapplication of this process. There is always in any process the possibility that someone could experience some discomfort.

Work with the following scenarios to increase your will. Using the previously mentioned Emoclear processes and drills can assist in creating a more powerful will. Will is highly important to our well-being. Sometimes in life, when we're buffeted around, we have to call on our will to persist in the face of inertia, low frustration tolerance, anxiety, dark moods, and incessant doubts.

In some state dependent situations knowing the positive meanings of things or seeing excellent outcomes may be submerged by confusion and overwhelm. Sometimes we might have to gut it out or will our way forward before our experience changes. The person who can make a choice and stick to it has a strong advantage in life. Here is a list of items to be practiced to increase the powers of will:

Do something that would call on you to be courageous. Confront something in yourself or in life that will make you face anxiety or fear. (There's no need to do something physically dangerous).

Make a goal--commit to it--carry it out.

Do something that you believe you can't stand, is too much, or is overwhelming. Carry it out until it's done. The "I Stood it Exercise" is a good framework.

Face a self-defeating habit and break it.

Undertake doing something you've not previously done.

Drop something unrequired in your life.

Put off doing what you feel is important.

Do something quickly you normally do slowly. Do something slowly that you regularly do quickly.

Undertake something right away where you often procrastinate.

Assert yourself where you normally would not. Say no where you regularly say yes. Say yes where you normally say no.

If you must decide something, do it right away.

Do something you normally might find embarrassing. (Don't do this at work).

 

Notice how you make something difficult, hard, or boring with your thoughts. Can you think about it some other way?

 

What are the future consequences of doing something easier?

 

Avoid making a choice when you are very stressed or your mind is elsewhere.

 

What is the wiser course of action?  The more impulsive decision?

 

When you avoid taking action on something important, what are your habitual excuses?  Write them down.

 

Can you notice when you suffer from sudden fatigue at the thought of taking action on something important?  Can you take action anyway?

 

Can you imagine a challenge becoming easier to do?

 

Know your rewards for succeeding at a difficult task.

 

Can you feel the cravings, but not impulsively act on them?

 

In the past when you practiced self-control, what were you doing?  Make a list and be prepared to do those things again.

Work with the I Stood It Exercise found on our A to Z list.



Have fun, Steve


 

 

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